Oh, I Definately Win
by DoctorWhoGal
Summary: When The Doctor and River Song's daughter Lia decides they should have a Halloween Fancy Dress competition, who will come out on top? The Doctor, Amy, Rory, River or Lia? Read on and find out...


When The Doctor and River Song's daughter Lia decides they should have a Halloween Fancy Dress competition, who will come out on top? The Doctor, Amy, Rory, River or Lia? Read on and find out...

Halloween had arrived on the TARDIS. The Doctor had decided to land on the spooky holiday as he thought they all deserved to have some fun. Well, defeating aliens and visiting planets was kind of exhausting. After a while, they all just needed to have a break. Without any trouble or danger involved. It wasn't for The Doctor's benefit, it was for his family's. Why would he want to have a break when there was so much out there just waiting to be discovered.

The Doctor, Amy, Rory and River were sat in the control room, discussing ideas on how to celebrate when The Doctor and River's daughter, Lia rushed in, her face flushed with excitement.

Running over to the sofa and sitting beside her parents, pushing The Doctor to budge up which he did so reluctantly, Lia clapped her hands to get her family's attention.

"I know the perfect way we can celebrate Halloween." she said, running a hand through her brown locks.

"Finally, someone has an idea!" River smirked and turned towards her husband. "We've only had rubbish suggestions so far, mainly by your father."

The Doctor pouted at her. "I'll have you know River Song, my ideas are not rubbish!" He nudged River in the side, which made her shirk away from him, raising an eyebrow in annoyance. He then proceeded to straighten his bowtie in a smug way. "My ideas are cool."

"Says the man who think fish fingers and custard go well together." Amy said, grinning when she saw the expression on The Doctor's face.

"Mother does have a point, sweetie. And you so know it." River laughed when she saw The Doctor look to Rory for help, who had just been listening to their conversation in amusement.

"Rory, help! The Pond women are ganging up on me! I need someone to be on my side!" Rory looked at The Doctor, not knowing what to do.

"Rory, if you side with Mr 'He thinks he has cool ideas' over here, you know where you'll not be sleeping tonight." Amy crossed her arms as she gazed at her husband. She tapped her fingers against her arm as she waited for his response. "Choose carefully. And I mean, very carefully."

Rory knew instantly what his decision was going to be. Throwing an apologetic look at The Doctor, he moved to stand beside his wife and daughter, who both looked at The Doctor in triumph.

"Sorry, Doctor. But I have to agree with Amy and River. Because if I don't, Amy would hurt me. And sometimes, your ideas can be just a little eccentric."

The Doctor looked at Rory, wounded. "Rory Williams, I was relying on you! Three against one, thats hardly fair!"

"Nothings fair, sweetie. You of all people should know that." River reached over to brush The Doctor's fringe out of his eyes. The Doctor was about to respond when Lia coughed loudly, which made them all turn to look at her.

"As much as I love to see you all winding Dad up." Lia said, smirking at her father who stuck his tounge out at her immaturely. "But you all seem to have forgotton that I have a suggestion on how we can celebrate Halloween."

"Sorry, honey." River smiled at her daughter, shuffling closer to her on the sofa. "What was your idea?"

"I bet it will be better than anything The Doctor can come up with." Amy interrupted, laughing and dodging out of the way when The Doctor tried to grab her.

The Doctor was about to make a smart comment back when Lia glared at him, looking just like her mother. It made him stop immediately.

"Anyway, before Dad rudely interrupted, I was going to say I think we should have a Halloween Fancy Dress competition. We should all come as something scary. And whoever comes up with the best costume should get a prize."

Lia put a hand on her hip, waiting to hear what her family thought. "Well, what do you think?"

The Doctor, River, Amy and Rory all looked at each other, then at Lia before smiling.

"That, Lia Song, is genius!" The Doctor said, bopping her on the nose which made her giggle. He ran a hand through his hair, looking slightly miffed. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"Because you lack the creativity us Pond women have, Raggedy Man." Amy smirked, laughing at the bewildered expression The Doctor was pulling.

"Nice one, Gran!" Lia high-fived Amy, who grinned at her grand daughter.

"Well, its true! And River will agree with me." Amy turned her attention to her daughter, who was biting her lip trying not to burst out laughing. "Won't you, River?"

River nodded in agreement. She smiled mischeviously at The Doctor. "Oh, I definately agree, Mother." She started to gently stroke The Doctor's arm and he couldn't help but lean into her touch. "Though The Doctor has his own way of being creative." She gazed at The Doctor through her long eyelashes. "Believe me, I should know. And it is very, very good."

The Doctor was about to reply to what his wife said when Rory cleared his throat.

"Hello, parents in the room!" he said, pointing at himself then at Amy.

The Doctor looked at the ground, his face turning a deep shade of red. River and Lia stared at him, silently chuckling.

"Sorry, Rory." he muttered, pulling his arm out of River's grasp.

Rory shook his head fondly before pointing a finger at his son-in-law. "I know you and River are married, but it can be uncomfortable seeing your daughter flirt in front of you."

"And me!" Lia agreed, holding up her hand. She tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear as she looked at her father.

The Doctor met all of their eyes in turn and grinned before giving Rory a salute. Rory gave him one back before turning to Lia.

"So, Little Song. What should the prize be for whoever wins the Fancy Dress competition?"

Lia moved off the sofa to stand in front of them all, Rory slipping into her vacant seat. "I think the winner should choose where we go next. They can pick wherever they want, no matter how dangerous or boring it is." Lia shaked her head so her hair cascaded down one of her shoulders. "And the others are not allowed to say no."

River raised an eyebrow at her. "What if it's a place you really don't want to go to?" She smiled at her husband. "Like a planet filled with hat shops that I will be ever so tempted to shoot?"

The Doctor sighed and looked offended. "Oi! There's nothing wrong with hat shops! And you know how I feel about guns, River."  
River was about to retort when Lia talked over her. "Yes, Dad. We all know you have a hat fetish and hate guns." Amy snorted with laughter, causing The Doctor to narrow his eyes at her. "Anyway, Mum. You can't say no to whoever wins. No matter how much you want to."

Lia started to walk out of the room, before turning back and addressing her family. "We all have an hour to get our costumes ready. Allons-y!"

"Hey, you can't say Allons-y! Thats what I say!" The Doctor said as he, River, Amy and Rory followed Lia out into the corridor.

"Dad, I can say what I like. And anyway according to Mum, you haven't said Allons-y since your tenth regeneration. So I thought I'd have it." She raised an eyebrow at her father, which reminded him of River. "Problem?"

The Doctor paused before shaking his head. "No."

Lia smiled as she walked to her bedroom. "Good." Slammimg the door behind her, they heard the ruffle of clothes as she shifted through her wardrobe.

The Doctor, River, Amy and Rory all looked at each other before heading off in seperate directions, Amy and Rory heading to the TARDIS wardrobe and The Doctor and River heading to their bedroom.

"You know I'll win, Doctor and don't try and deny it." River said with a sly grin as she headed into the bedroom, hiding some clothes under her dress so The Doctor couldn't see. She made to go but The Doctor grabbed her wrist and whirled her around.

"I do believe that sounds like a challenege, River." he whispered, tucking a curl of her hair behind her ear.

River reached up and stroked The Doctor's hair. She wound a lock of it around her finger, smirking when he closed his eyes and leaned into her touch.

"You bet it is, sweetie." She gave him a mischevious grin before kissing him on the cheek and walking out of the room. "Bring it on!"

The Doctor shook his head fondly before going to his wardrobe and pulling out a number of items. He knew exactly what he was going to wear. And he was determined he was going to win. Like River said, bring it on.

Putting the final touches to her costume, Lia checked her appearance in the mirror before heading to the control room, where Amy and Rory were all ready there waiting. When they saw their grand daughter heading towards them, they both gasped.

"Wow, Lia. You look beautiful!" Amy said, as Lia twirled around showing off her outfit.

"Beautiful and scary." Rory agreed, as Lia slowed to a holt, beaming at them in thanks.

Lia had decided to dress up as a vampire fish. When her dad told her the story of when he, Amy and Rory had met vampires in Venice who turned out to be fish people, she got so scared about it she couldn't sleep for a week. Which didn't please her mother at all. So she thought it was the perfect thing to dress as. Borrowing Amy's white dress which just about fitted, a pair of fangs found in the depths of the TARDIS wardrobe and adding make up to her face to make her look pale, she thought she looked the part.

"Thanks, Gran and Grandad. You both look great." Amy had dressed as a Weeping Angel, with a grey wig that just about perched on her red hair, a grey dress which looked like it was made out of a bed sheet and her face powdered grey. She had also added grey fangs and grey fake fingernails to complete the look.

Rory had of course come as a Centurion. With a red cape, armour and a golden sword tucked into his belt, he definately looked the part. But Lia was confused.

"How come you dressed as a Centurion, Grandad? The last time I looked, they weren't scary."

Rory tied his cape more firmly around him as he answered Lia. "Trust me, you wouldn't want to meet a Centurion when he's angry. I've met a few angry Centurions. Let's just say, they weren't the friendly type."

Lia giggled. She then looked round to see if her mother or father had arrived yet. They were taking a long time. "I wonder where Mum and Dad are? I want to see what they've come as."

Amy stifled a laugh as she imagined what The Doctor would be wearing. "Knowing The Doctor, he'll probably come as a fish finger without custard. Or a shot hat!"

Before she could help it, Lia burst out laughing before Amy joined in, her shoulders shuddering up and down. Rory started to chuckle too before he saw something behind Lia that made him stop in shock.

"You have got to be joking..."

Wondering what Rory was talking about, Amy and Lia both whirled around to where he was pointing. What they both saw made them burst into endless giggles.

Standing in the doorway in a blonde curly wig and one of River's black dresses that was a bit on the small side for him and high heels was The Doctor. Struggling over to them, The Doctor almost tripped over his own feet, which made even Rory chuckle loudly. Gaining his composure, The Doctor put a hand on his hip, smirking at the expressions on all of their faces.

"Hello, sweeties!" he said in a voice which sounded nothing like River's. Lia walked over to him, clutching her sides as she tried to stop laughing. Her grandparent's still looked to be in hysterics.

"Dad, what in the name of sanity are you wearing?!"

The Doctor gazed down at his costume, then at his daughter in bewilderment. "You said come as something scary. So I thought the scariest person I know is your mother!"

Lia giggled as The Doctor's wig slipped off his head. In his haste to pick it up, he tripped in the high heels again, which made Amy and Rory laugh even more than they thought possible.

"Dad, if Mum sees you dressed like that, she won't just shoot your wig, she'll shoot you in the head!" She pointed in the direction of the corridor. "Go and change into something else. Now! I'm doing it for your safety!"

Just as The Doctor was going to head off, they heard someone clear their throat to get their attention. After Amy and Rory managed to compose themselves, they all turned around. And burst out laughing all over again.

River was stood leaning against the wall, wearing one of The Doctor's tweed jackets, shirts, trousers, shoes and of course, the legendary bowtie. On top of her head was a Fez, which just about sat on her unruly curls. Walking over to her husband, she gazed at what he was wearing.

"Sweetie, is that supposed to be me? The hair is all wrong and I haven't worn those high heels since I was a teenager. And have you got a gun? You can't be me without a gun! But apart from that, you look quite good. If I do say so myself."

The Doctor crossed his arms, wobbling a little in the high heels. "I'm not supposed to look good, River. I'm supposed to look scary! Which I have obviously failed at as everyone is acting hysterically."

He nodded his head at Amy and Rory, who had at last stopped giggling and were listening to the conversation going on.

"And anyway, why dress as me? Though your costume is brilliant. Very Doctor-like."

He gently flicked the Fez, which made her tut at him. "I told you, I wanted to win, sweetie." She looked at the outfits her family was wearing and smirked in triumph. "And oh, I definately win."

River was about to kiss The Doctor when Rory clapped his hands, which made her stop. The Doctor and River kissing whilst dressed as each other was kind of disturbing.

"Actually River, you haven't won." He walked towards Lia and pressed a kiss to her head. "Thats for Lia to decide. Lia's choice."

"So, Lia. Who's it going to be?" Amy said, walking over to where Rory was standing. "The Weeping Angel, the Centurion, the accident waiting to happen or your mother?"

Lia silently thought for a few minutes before making her decision. The costumes her family had chosen were amazing and she was thrilled they had put in so much effort. But in her mind, there was one clear winner.

"I'm going to have to go with Dad." The Doctor punched the air in triumph and hugged Lia, sticking his tounge out at River who glared at him. "Honey, you could of picked any one of us. And yet, you choose your father. Why?"

Lia looked at her dad, then back at River, a mischevious glint in her eye. "Because I haven't seen anything so terrifying in a long time!"

Lia squealed as The Doctor and River both pounced on her together, attacking her sides. After a few minutes, they stopped to let her catch her breath.

"That is not funny!" she said, trying to look cross. But no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't. She loved her mum and dad so much, she couldn't stay angry at them for long.

The Doctor raised an eyebrow at River who grinned back. "No, but this is!"

Picking Lia up, he ran over to the console, River, Rory and Amy not far behind, all laughing. Setting Lia down, he put an arm around her as he set coordinates for where he wanted to go.

"So, Raggedy Man. Where are we off to this time?" Amy asked, moving to stand next to Lia.

"Are we going somewhere we'll like?" Rory said, putting an arm around Amy's waist.

The Doctor pulled a few levers on the console to send the TARDIS into the time vortex. He then looked at his wife and gave a sly smile.

"Good questions, Ponds. I'll tell you where we're going."

Reaching out a hand, he tossed off the wig he was wearing and stole River's Fez off her head before placing it on his own.  
"We're going to Fedonia." He gently bopped River on the nose. "Planet of the Fez shops!"

"No!" River cried, pretending to be angry. The Doctor, Amy, Rory and Lia all laughed at her before heading off to get changed.

River didn't really want to go to a planet filled with Fezes galore. It was one of her worst nigtmares. But as long as she had her family with her, she wouldn't have it any other way.

I hope everyone liked it :)

Amy x


End file.
